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I’ve got five kids, I’m a queer feminist, and I just might be the only life coach in the world who doesn’t believe in the Law of Attraction.

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How I Stay On Top Of My Busy Life (Or: “Lessons Learned The Hard Way”)

*Queen Sweep

Hello, darlings, I’m writing to you from the world’s most adorable AirBnB, where Nick and I have snuck away for a few days of couple time. Yes I’m writing to you from my retreat, because sometimes you get inspired and need to say things. But this is key: when I’m done typing this, I’ll put my laptop AWAY and get in the hot tub. 

And I’ll actually be able to enjoy it because all the 84,000 things swimming around in my brain will be IN A SYSTEM (that is my Compass) that is NOT MY BRAIN. 

I’m getting ready to teach another Queen Sweep this spring (yay!) and so I’ve been thinking a lot about our brains. I feel like ADHD, especially inattentive type in women, has reached a tipping point and suddenly it’s everywhere and everyone has it.

Which feels odd, because a lot of my clients and readers and me and my husband and my kids and my mom (and okay basically everyone I know) have always known we were what we used to call ADD, whether officially diagnosed or not. 

And a lot of people think of it as this terribly negative thing, this major disadvantage…but I don’t. Truly. 

I have resolved to call us all “sparklebrains” because there’s a venn diagram where “right-brain creative overstimulated bored ADHD disorganized daydreamer brilliant highly sensitive synesthetic deep thinker mildly on the spectrum dyslexic poet melancholic mystic spicy enthusiast” all overlap.

In fact I sometimes think there’s more of us than the tiny little dot they classify as “neurotypical.” But ANYHOO. 

I feel protective of us, fiercely defensive, actually, because our sparklebrains are amazing and fantastic and wonderful. They are literally better at almost every part of life. 

I’m not kidding. 

We have the best ideas, insight, empathy, pattern recognition, intuition, bullshit sensor, holistic modeling, wisdom, long-term strategy, and senses of humor. 

The only thing our brains struggle with is being a good cog in the capitalist efficiency machine. 

It’s just that we have to clear those adulting-efficiency hurdles in order to get to the more interesting stuff. 

When you think about it like that, doesn’t it feel better? 

Sometimes people don’t understand why I teach a course on getting organized when they know I want to write books about deep spiritual things and also already coach some of the most phenomenal women on the planet. 

It’s because too many brilliant sparklebrains are getting shredded trying to be a cog and so they never get to get to the good stuff. 

I originally created what eventually became the Queen Sweep method as a lifeboat for myself, because I felt like I was drowning. I was sick of suffering so much in the service of so many things that didn’t matter to my SOUL (being on time, paying bills, keeping track of appointments and deadlines, cleaning things) but made my human self very, very miserable when undone. 

In other words, I only know how to manage my life because I was forced to figure it out the hard way.

Incidentally, in high school, I had quite possibly the worst math teacher that ever existed. He was the worst not because he was mean or unreasonable or added trick questions to the tests.

He was the worst because math very clearly came easily to him and he didn’t understand why it didn’t come just as easily to us. So he couldn’t explain it.

It might sound strange when I tell you that my main qualification for creating The Queen Sweep systems is that I myself am a total “artistic flake”– but you know who understands the challenges of staying organized and on top of life? An artistic flake! 

These things do not come easily to me! These skills were honed in the trenches of overwhelm and avoidance and mess!

I can teach you about these things because I’ve lived them. I know the very specific fear that is avoiding intimidating paperwork or just not being able to pick up the phone to make the call that would probably only take two minutes. I created the system that didn’t exist for people like us. 

Still, sometimes I’m like, wait, who am I to teach this stuff?!? But then it turns out I have answers.

I also know how to do all this because I’ve taught literally thousands of people how to use these methods.

For twelve years now, I’ve been walking people through the Queen Sweep tools. I know the questions that will come, the doubts we all have to overcome (“Will I actually stick with this?” “Is everyone going to judge my mess?” “Will this be helpful if I’m actually not super, duper disorganized?”)

I know where people get stuck in the process. I know the unkind stories you’ll tell yourself. I know that a key for us is doing things in circles, like a spiral, because each turn up the spiral our lives get tighter, brighter, and more beautiful. Each time, we discover new ways to make things easier and better and more beautiful and less overwhelming. 

Also? I know how to do this because I continue to stress-test these methods every blessed day in my 1,500-square-foot home with FIVE CHILDREN, a husband, and a dog.

It’s one thing to Marie Kondo a tiny condo where you live by yourself. It’s something else entirely to stay on top of a life and a home that’s shared by six other people plus dog plus sometimes chickens.

Every day I have the opportunity to practice what I preach – making truly doable to-do lists, having a “beauty spot,” making the spaces you use the most the best (and ignoring the rest).

Every day when I’m tidying the kitchen in a tiny, five-minute swoop, or hauling a bag of swim gear to swimming lessons, or coordinating Christmas gifts for all these children, I have the opportunity to ask: “Is this still working?” Each day when I stop doing those things and turn my energy to the things that my soul craves, like writing, the answer is, “yes.”

Oh yeah, I also know how to do this because I’m a master life coach.

Frankly, I think lived experience trumps professional qualifications (DID YOU SEE THE PART WHERE I SAID THAT SEVEN PEOPLE LIVE IN A 1,500 SQUARE FOOT HOUSE).

That being said, I’m also a master certified Wayfinder life coach who trained with Dr. Martha Beck, I’ve worked with a roster of private clients whose secret identities might blow your mind, and in the past twelve years I’ve taken thousands of sparklebrain humans through my courses on getting organized, setting energetic boundaries, managing your money as an entrepreneur, and other useful life skills.

Each time I learn new things about how we learn, and each time I become more and more impassioned about why it’s so important to empower the sparklebrains and kindred spirits of the world to get out of our own way so we can do the magnificent things your body spirit mind and brain are here to do. 

So all that to say… Queen Sweep is coming this spring. 

And next week, I’ve got something brand BRAND new coming your way… and it’s totally free… and I made it not just to work even if you’re overwhelmed, I straight up made it for all of us who are paddling madly in a sea of overwhelm. 

It’s my same lifeboat… I just made it big enough for all of us. 

Watch for a big announcement on Sunday. 

Just 7 minutes, because you're absurdly busy. 7 minutes to clear your mind and refresh your spirit. 7 minutes to thank your fierce tender holy sacred tired body. 7 minutes that'll leave you centered, grounded, & clear-- like the epic fucking badass you are.

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take 7 minutes for your heart

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I’ve got five kids, I’m a queer feminist, and I just might be the only life coach in the world who doesn’t believe in the Law of Attraction.

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I write things for women with big, gorgeous, COMPLICATED lives. I help women become epic fucking badasses… but I still retain my right to cry at every diaper commercial ever made.

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