I’m writing you a little bit high on horse magic. I’m in California with a beautiful client and we just wrapped up two days of absolute bliss– complete with horses, sunburn, dust, flies, and a reminder that the world is more magical and mysterious that most people can even HANDLE.
It’s funny how you can keep learning the same lessons over and over and over. Each time I bring a beloved client to go horse whispering with me, I re-remember the same deep truths. But each time they sink into my being a little deeper.
Here are the things I want to remember:
We are so much more powerful than we believe. (Without exception. Every one of us. Always. Even when you feel weakest and puniest– ESPECIALLY then.)
We can be so much kinder to each other than we are to ourselves. This is why we need each other.
Our bodies know things that our minds are unaware of.
Most of us are never communicating quite as clearly as we THINK we are.
True clarity feels radically uncomfortable to many, many women. We’ve literally been programmed not to speak clearly about what we need and want. (This makes so many things make sense.) In particular, communicating clearly when asking for what we want can feel utterly terrifying.
BUT.
On the other side of that discomfort is an incredible sweetness.
Instead of the world falling apart, the way it feels it will if we say the thing we think we cannot say, we end up in pure communion– if not with the person we’re communicating with, AT LEAST WITH OURSELVES. This is no small thing.
Here’s a funny truth: The horses like people best when you’re just being the most yourself, taking care of yourself, doing whatever it strikes you to do with clear forward momentum. Since the horses are kind of an expression of the whole universe, this might be worth noting.
Also: the closer I can get my root chakra to the ground, the more clear and grounded I feel. This means that I squatted my ass right down to the earth in a nice birth squat at several points, and it was very dignified.
Okay, it wasn’t dignified IN THE SLIGHTEST, but I remembered that grounded and loose and free is even better than dignified. This is the wisdom of horse magic.
The earth has such beautiful curves, and they are so beautiful to me. I bet your curves are beautiful too. (I rested my head in the breast of a luscious mountain across the valley, as you can see in the photo up there, and she hugged me back with such fierce love that I wriggled in joy. I could literally feel her loving energy whoosh up through my feet. You would have felt it too, if you were there.)
My urge is always always to tighten up around things: to tighten in anxiety, tighten in eagerness, tighten in defensiveness, tighten in excitement–
but when I LOOSEN my tightening, then bliss trickles in.
Dammit.
I like bliss.
I like bliss in the form of eucalyptus trees, and voluptuous mama mountains, and running fast golden horses, and watching someone’s power well up, and how tender we are and how tender we can be. I like bliss in the form of a glass of perfect champagne, and deep heart-to-heart talks, and epiphanies, and hot showers and green juice and sunlight on my shoulders. The bliss of a good story and the bliss of letting our old stories go.
To welcome in more bliss, we are being called to get BIGGER. We are longing for bigger paradigms, bigger hearts, bigger risks, bigger asks, bigger capacity, bigger resilience, bigger joy. This is not a dainty process but a sacred one nonetheless: I felt myself opening up, like when I was labor. Intense, joyful, WHOAH, and miraculous.
So here are my questions for you, dearheart. These are the questions we asked ourselves as we drenched ourselves in horse magic.
How big are you willing to get?
What kind of ripples do you want to send out into the world?
What are you willing to receive?
And most importantly:
Do you know you’re loved?
Because you are. You so, so are.
How do I know? Well. The horses told me, you see.
And I totally fucking believe them.
much love,
Katherine