Hello dear kindred spirits, oh you of the Big Feelings and tender heart. You with the big dreams and the thin skin. You with the wild gifts and the wild longings.
I’m thinking about you in this season. How you might be feeling just the tiniest bit floored and overwhelmed and scattered and bewildered and longing and wild and flattened and eager and pent up and empty and hopeful.
(But just in the past five minutes. Sheesh.)
Here are the things I would love to send every single one of you, a gift guide for kindred spirits full of essential (and frivolous) supplies to make life more beautiful.
Welcome to my very first gift guide!
I want to send you…
A Wishbeads bracelet to anchor in your intentions
I met Alexa, the founder of Wishbeads, at a writing retreat in Hawaii right before the pandemic. She sent us all home with one of her beautiful bracelets, with their substantial brass clasp to anchor in a wish. Here is what I wrote on the slip of paper I rolled up and stored in mine, what seemed like an absolutely impossible dream at the time: “All of us blooming and thriving in our own big beautiful house on Salt Spring Island.” Lo and behold, here we are. I’m telling you. Get yourself one of these.
Tarot Wisdom from The Tarot Lady
I met Theresa, aka “The Tarot Lady,” on that same retreat. These two fierce, tender kindred spirits held my hand very early in the dark of one morning and helped me give birth to my memoir, Holy Heathen. You should read everything Theresa has written, honestly, and her Uncommon Tarot is one of my favorite decks, but her latest offering is Tarot for Kids: isn’t it beautiful? Sometimes I think the little ones who still live inside me might like the gentleness of this deck as much as anyone else!
The Secret Society of Saint Nicholas
I wrote this book for kindred spirits, of any age, who have ever been heartbroken by terrible news about Santa and longed for real magic. Deep magic. I have a vision of transforming this small moment of heartbreak into an empowering rite of passage that helps us all embrace our own ability to make a difference in the world. Buy a copy now for anyone you know with kids, long before they think they need it. Because when they need it… they’ll really need it.
Gift Boxes by Gifted by FreeFrom
I learned about this incredible organization from Chani Nichols. Beautiful curated self-care gift boxes made by survivors of domestic violence, in a business model to help break the cycle of intergenerational trauma through financial empowerment. I love their zodiac boxes, but I have my eye on their Happy New Year box for fresh starts, too.
Potions From My Favorite Apothecary
This one is especially for my Canadian friends. When we were living in Alberta, we got to know this beautiful human who made salves, candles, potions, teas, and arts so magical and soulful that I fell quite in love. Her calendula salve is so good at healing cuts, hangnails, and owwies of all kinds that my family calls it “magic cream” and I stash them in our medicine cabinet, mama kit, car, and purse. She forages the ingredients in the foothills and I do think she sows magic as she goes.
This book on pronouns, by my husband
Did you know that my beloved Nick North wrote a book?? It’s the book he wished he could have had as a little kid, when no one had language to help him understand his experience as a transgender kid, let alone ask him what his pronouns were. His, Hers, Them & Theirs: Learning Pronouns With The Bears is aimed at young readers, from ages 3 – 8, with gentle rhymes and cheerful images. I’m so proud of my husband, and of this book, and the loving conversations it has the power to inspire– get your limited edition copy now.
The Pouring Over Books Box
I covet this book subscription. Which is silly, because I don’t drink coffee and it doesn’t even ship to Canada. But I covet it anyway, because LaShawn Wiltz is always reading something that looks smart, tantalizing, and delicious. And she is wise about making good choices and knowing about things before anyone else does. So if you live in the USA, and you love books AND coffee, you’ve got to get on her list for when she opens up her next box.
The EFBA Journal
Eeek! I’m excited! This hardback journal has previously only been available to my private clients, but this year you can get one, too! It will guide you through a full year with prompts and questions drawn from my years of coaching kindred spirits, poems from my own life, and images and pages to gently jolt you into savoring your own beautiful, EFBA (epic fucking badass) life. It helps you set up your entire year, then walks you through it month by month to set priorities, track all the things you DID do (not just things yet to do), and jot down those moments you want to savor and remember. I’ve been using this exact journal for ten years myself and they are one of the things I would grab from my house in an emergency, a treasure map of where I’ve been and where I mean to go. Grab yours here.
(A tiny heads-up for kindred spirits who are excited about this and are going to feel angry in a minute: It’s expensive for a journal. It really is. That’s because I didn’t know how to self-publish things when I created it, lo these many years ago, so I accidentally went with an expensive print-on-demand service. One of my hopes for the next couple of years is to create a version that is a bit more accessible. But for now, this is what I have, and I wanted to share with you because it’s such a steady, helpful companion through the months. Be sure you click on the preview button: you can look at the whole thing to see exactly how it will walk you through the year. If it calls to you, I do believe it’s a worthy investment in your own trajectory.)
Breathwork with Kristen Kalp
Teaching a poetry class with my friend KK {All The Feels: Permission to write bad poetry and love it} was one of my very favorite parts of 2021. When she’s not teaching cathartic, hilarious classes like that with me, or being very smart about entrepreneurship, she teaches these incredible breathwork courses– some live, some recorded for us shy folk– and they are INCREDIBLE. Like doing a juice cleanse for your spirit. In her words: “Feeling numb, disconnected, languish-y, or meh? This is for you.” Go breathe with her.
A book for perfectionists & workaholics
My friend Caroline wrote this book this year: You Don’t Owe Anyone. It’s for all you “try-hards” who are ready to get free of the weigh of others’ expectations and move forward without apology. Caroline speaks from experience: “She was world class at being the good girl and the people pleaser. (She was in a cult, and she was good at it!)” This wisdom is hard-won and sure to unburden many a kindred spirit.
A Discovery+ subscription so you can watch our home reno show
If you’ve ever wondered what it was like to move our family of 7 people from a suburban 2600 square foot home into a falling-down 1200-square foot cabin/cottage/charmer/fixer-upper that we bought sight unseen on an island at the height of the pandemic… well don’t worry, we filmed the whole thing for you. It’s on the show Life Under Renovation, streaming right now on Discovery+ in both the USA and Canada. (You can watch it through a big fancy tv, a laptop, or even your phone.) To say we were in over our heads is like saying Joanna Gaines is kinda handy. Our big goals of a shed-sort-of-thing and some new posts were put to shame by the beautiful sunroom from SunCoast, a bunkie from Sawmill Structures, and electricians-who-were-also-guardian-angels, and if you find yourself shopping for any of those this holiday, tell ’em I sent you.
My favorite tea
Not everything has to be bespoke to be wonderful. My favorite tea is available in most grocery stores in the USA and Canada, and I’m in love with it. Every single thing I write is powered by their Double Bergamot Earl Grey… and bonus is that the blue tea bags packs can be recycled AND they match my pretty blue kettle.
Permission To Go Away
Just forward this email to someone who loves you, with a little note that says, “Ahem…” One of the greatest gifts I give to myself, and my husband gives to himself, and we give to each other and our kids and our marriage and our work is time AWAY. Away from the house, the chores, the meals and dishes and pings about playdates and carpools. We each try to take a quarterly solo retreat, and while we don’t always make that goal 100%, just knowing that I can reliably count on several days alone is sometimes the thing that keeps me going in the busiest seasons. May I recommend booking one now for January?
Jewelry made from old shards
My friend Heather told me about this incredible kindred spirit who makes jewelry out of sea glass and antique and vintage china. Don’t you just love the metaphor of bits of old cracked discarded shards, things that are beyond repair, becoming transformed into a new kind of beauty? I mean is that a good metaphor or what?!?! Very very good metaphor indeed and a potent touchstone for making beauty out of broken things.
A stack of old magazines, scissors & paste
One of my very favorite year-end activities is to curl up with a stack of magazines and let my dreams unfurl for the coming year. Some people call this “making a vision board” but I think of it as a kind of meditative artform, a way to process things nonverbally, a way to make ritual and art out of what I’m laying to rest and what is calling to be born. It’s a powerful form of right-brain alchemy for kindred spirits. Last year my art collage ended up covering my entire closet door, and I call it my “vision portal.” Pretty sure this year I’m going to do the other door too.
My memoir, Holy Heathen
This is the story of how I went from a really scared missionary kid, convinced I was going to hell because of my awful secret wickedness, to a hot mess of a young woman who burned her whole life down, to the phoenix of the woman I grew up to be– a thriving heathen mystic, parent, and healer. This is for kindred spirits everywhere: for you and anyone you know who grew up in religion but longed for magic, mystery, and a sense of belonging. It’s also all my most embarrassing secrets spilled out on the page, and oh, like, my heart. Available worldwide.
Classy European Leather Goods
My friend Karen swears by these simple, chic leather products, and she lives in Denmark and is wise about such things. So if you live in Europe, go check out these beautiful bags, folders, boxes, and device cases. I predict you will instantly feel more glamorous.
My very favorite pens
I’m trying to play it cool here. Not only are these my favorite pens, they are in fact the ONLY pens I can even stand to write with these days. Does that sound impossibly princessy and ridiculous? I careth not. These are the perfect pens. The most glorious pens. Canary colored pens! The ONLY pens! You used to only be able to get them in Japan but now they’re everywhere. My favorite is the .7mm width in black or blue-black. Those write the most poetic thoughts.
A month (or 12) in my RichJuicyStarryBeauty community
This is my behind-the-scenes intimate secret blog where I share things as they emerge, before I polish them and turn them into “pieces,” posts, missives, books, and courses. Currently I’m sharing the poems that surprised me by flowing in… not to mention secret peeks into the drama behind the camera of our tv show, my artistic ponderings, creative ups and downs, and glimpses into things I’m not ready to share publicly. I’m going to be withdrawing even more deeply into this community in the coming year, as I pull my energy in to make new work. This is a wildly accessible way to come closer. Draw near, dearheart. Life is messy, but we can make it beautiful anyway. This is where I do it.
Six months of private coaching for kindred spirits
You may have seen that I’m gently shifting the way I work. I used to work exclusively with my beloved kindred spirit clients for a full year. As I try (always! but especially this coming year!) to make more art, I’m practicing being more nimble. I have a handful of six-month private coaching engagements available for folks who want to start in the new year. I’m not saying I’m retiring from coaching after that. But I’m not promising that I’m not, either. Curious? Fill out the application, tell me where you’re at, and we can talk about it. It really would make the most glorious gift to yourself: just to shift the entire trajectory of your entire life in 2022. Just that, dearheart. Just that.
I hope you enjoyed my gift guide for kindred spirits!
Well there you have it. Some frivolous and essential supplies for traveling this life and making it a little bit more beautiful.
(None of these are affiliate links. Unless of course it’s something I’m selling, in which case I am wholly, fully affiliated.)
Wishing you moments of peace amidst the bustle, deep breaths in busy moments, and gentleness through all of it.
As the days grow shorter and darker, may you find so many ways to bring the light… and maybe even the twinkle.
Merry merry, dearheart.