Each year, I declare a phrase of the year. 

I was originally inspired by Christine Kane’s Word Of The Year exercise, though I’ve decided I can’t possibly stay within the strict confines of JUST ONE WORD.

My first word, in 2010, was Dominion.

Funny thing– did you ever notice my company is called Declare Dominion?

2011 was Prosper.  That was the year it All Fell Apart.

2012 was Bloom.  That was the year I created my journal, A Year Most Lovely, and it looks like this:

2013 was Awake.

And in 2014, my phrase was Epic Fucking Badass.

That’s because at the end of 2013 there were some really, really hard things happening in my life, and I felt like just to get through it all, I had to be… well… yes, an epic fucking badass.

My words have a way of filtering from into all aspects of my life.  (Maybe in 2015 my phrase should be Hot Sex & A Mini Cooper.)  But in particular, they seep into my coaching programs.

That’s because I only can teach what I have lived.

And over the past two years, I have been an epic fucking badass.

***Did you notice that I just bragged there??

Make sure you notice it.  Make sure you JUDGE me. ***

And something extraordinary happened when I made that phrase my mantra, my touchstone, my rallying cry.

I became one.  I’m not kidding.

I think if you saw the ins and outs of my life, and had watched me press my face to the floor in grief and pain and total devastation, and then watched me get up and mother my daughter and coach my clients and keep writing my book, I think you would agree that I was an EFBA.

But since you weren’t there, you’ll just have to take my word for it.

I’m a reliable narrator, for you English majors out there.

Here is the thing.

I bet you are an epic fucking badass too.  You might not use those words; perhaps you swear less than me, which is to say LESS THAN A FILTHY FUCKING PIRATE.

But I bet you do things that scare you.
You do impossibly hard things.
You try to be kind when you almost can’t.
You get up every day and you LIVE.

Here is what it means to be an epic fucking badass. 

You let yourself have your emotions.  You cry, you rejoice, you rage, you weep.  And you let them pass through you because you know they are just trying to communicate with you.

You tell the truth.  You tell it as kindly as possible.  And at times you hold your tongue, because you are wise and not a fool.  But to yourself, about yourself?  You tell the fucking truth.

You know that what happens in the invisible places is potent and to be respected.  You understand the power of silence.  Of deep pondering.  Of the most confidential conversations.  You know that a solitary moment by a pool of water could change your whole life.  You understand the secret nature of things.

You revere beauty.  You understand that a freshly made bed, a good shoe, and the soft feel of cashmere are not frivolous; they are powerful talismans.  You know that taking a moment to gaze at a flower or the moon or a sunset is not a waste of time; it’s the whole point of time.

You hit the floor sometimes.  Sometimes the chaos in your own head is almost unbearable. Sometimes the circumstances of your life bring you to your elbows.  You are not hardened, you are not an automaton, and the griefs of the world and your own heart, they GET you.

You always get up.  Always, always, always.  This is the only entry requirement to being an EFBA.  Sometimes you stagger up, messy and muddy and bedraggled and blinking.  And sometimes you rise up clear and powerful and full of grace.  And sometimes you hold your head high while the flashbulbs go off, and sometimes you slink off wounded, but YOU FUCKING GET UP.

You know how to LAUGH, my darling.  This is the flip side of the intensity.  You will discover that you have joy twined into your very DNA, and you only need to know how to activate it.

You are just MORE than most people.  You feel more, think more, question more, wonder more.  People will tell you that you are too intense. Too sensitive.  Too rebellious.  Too yearning.  A drama queen.

You will learn, minute by minute, to just smile at them.  (Your smile is so mysterious, so…maddening.)

You are not too much.  

You are just more awake than most people.

You are an epic fucking badass.

And you are my favorite.

much love,
Anna

p.s.  In 2015, I will work a few EFBA-in-training for a full year in the EFBA Mentorship.  I just thought you might want to know.  In case you’re supposed to be one of them.