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I’ve got five kids, I’m a queer feminist, and I just might be the only life coach in the world who doesn’t believe in the Law of Attraction.

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The 3 Best Investments I’ve Ever Made 


I’m still buzzing after a weekend spent with some of my amazing clients.  These beauties traveled to Portland and we had the BEST time.  They’re part of a group of women (a bunch of whom aren’t in this photo) who worked with me for a full year this past year in a program called The Year of Magic.

Needless to say, they are unbelievably magical and I’m so proud of them that sometimes my earrings pop out.

I’ve been thinking a lot about investments as this year’s clients wrap up our work together, and as I talk to kindred spirits around the world about embarking on a new adventure together next year.  It takes some chutzpah to ask people to commit to making an investment of time, money, trust, and action.

So I’ve been thinking through some of the best investments I’ve ever made myself, and I thought I’d share them with you here.


1. College.  Even after spending every single cent my parents and grandparents had painstakingly set aside, and with hefty grants, and with a work schedule that often included 30 hours a week, I still left Bryn Mawr with a pile of student loans.  It took me until my mid-thirties to pay those loans off, and I’ve never resented a single penny.  One of our college presidents famously said that the goal of a liberal arts education is to make your mind an interesting place to live the rest of your life, but college did much more than that for me.  It showed me that the invisible skeins of thoughts, passion, and insight that come from our minds and imaginations have real heft, weight, and power in the world.  Since I now make my living entirely by engaging my mind and heart, it’s clear that this was a very wise investment indeed. (That’s my old dorm room, under that weeping willow.) 


2. My Furla purse.  Flashback Friday: I bought this purse when I was pregnant with my daughter, in 2005.  It cost more than $600, a sum that made me gasp.  I’d never had a purse that cost more than $99 before.  But life was about to get heavier, and I needed a sturdy companion.  More importantly, I wanted to declare to myself and to the world that I was someone sturdy myself, someone to be reckoned with, someone who took herself seriously.  This purse has been in boardrooms, recording studios, and playgrounds.  It’s held client files, my breast pump, a laptop, and heels.  I’ve carried it nearly every single day since then.  That averages out to it costing less than 25 cents a day.  That bag taught me something priceless about quality vs quantity, long term vs short term.  I carry it still.  When I evaluate a new purchase, I use the Furla bag as my touchstone.  Will it last?  Will I be glad in five years that I spent this money?  Is it useful AND gorgeous?  If not, it’s a no.  (Yes, that’s me and my little critter, back in the day.)


3.  Working with amazing coaches.  I know, this one sounds self-serving since I’m a coach.  But it’s true.  I’d gotten plenty of coaching as part of my coach training, but it wasn’t until 2011 that I hired my own ‘big guns’ coach.  I picked the smartest, toughest, most soulful coach I could find.  And when the earthquake hit in March 2011 and my whole life turned upside down, she helped me wade through some of the scariest decisions of my whole life.  There is nothing like having a neutral, trusted person in your life who really doesn’t give a shit what you decide to do, she’s going to stand with you anyway, with a fierce compassion and no fear.  The kind of clarity I get from working with my coaches (I’ve hired many since then, to help me with business, relationships, writing, and more) is priceless.

So here’s the common thread in all these investments: they helped me become more of who I wanted to be.  They helped me grow stronger.  More clear.  More powerful.  They all combine elements of strength training with BEAUTY.

That’s what I aim to give to every person who invests in my classes and coaching, and who invest their time and attention reading this little missive every week.  May you go forth and invest wisely!

Also?  Invest 3 minutes of your life and go watch this.  Twin newborns show us the simplest kind of love.

Just 7 minutes, because you're absurdly busy. 7 minutes to clear your mind and refresh your spirit. 7 minutes to thank your fierce tender holy sacred tired body. 7 minutes that'll leave you centered, grounded, & clear-- like the epic fucking badass you are.

a free grounding meditation

take 7 minutes for your heart

& come home to yourself

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I’ve got five kids, I’m a queer feminist, and I just might be the only life coach in the world who doesn’t believe in the Law of Attraction.

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I write things for women with big, gorgeous, COMPLICATED lives. I help women become epic fucking badasses… but I still retain my right to cry at every diaper commercial ever made.

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Sustenance for the journey -- notes from a fellow
traveler to remind you of your own magic.